Big Deep Breaths

Big Deep Breaths
I can’t remember life before I had to take them all the time. Trying to get to the top of a breath throughout the day is such an interruption in productivity. Something so innate and thoughtless becomes a necessary focus and all of a sudden priorities get pushed aside for breathing. I actually have to stop whatever I am doing and focus on trying to breathe. I hate it.
But, it reminds me that I am not in control, and there are certain times in life when we must all be reminded that we are not in control and that our world is broken; namely we are broken. Seems like an odd position that the Lord would have us? Seems like He would want me confident and sure of my steps. Not true and not in keeping with the gospel. He wants me confident of Him and His ability to direct my steps, but not in control of them.

So visually I am getting this picture of being patient enough to let my step-dad come all the way around the car to open the door for me, something he insists on doing even though I have always fought him on it. I am a practical girl (and for some reason always in a hurry) and perfectly capable of opening a car door without a man. That’s just the point. I am capable, and impatience finds great company in independence.
I have always found strength in being a “mover and a shaker.” Yet, in this season, God would have me be still and know that He is God-and I am not. He doesn’t want me movin’ or shakin’ anything or anybody. He wants me recognizing my need for Him to move and shake on my behalf and patiently waiting on him to take my hand and help me outta the car. He is a gentleman, not at all in a hurry and completely at ease to saunter if He feels like it. ( Yes, Bob, you saunter 🙂
If I jump in and try to do my own “fixin'” I will altar the outcomes, and it will be less than He intends for me. In the present, I might say, “Ah, it is handled; now I can check that off my list and go about my day.” Yet in reality, I have added something that likely will need “fixin'” because it wasn’t God’s plan; thus I just broke it further. So, instead of forging ahead, movin’ and shakin’ stuff outta my way and off my day, I would find better company to wait…pray… and wait; then the view will come into focus, and I will clearly see where to step next.  Big deep breaths get easier to climb to the top of when we stop moving to take them, and it is as He intends even when it is still broken. And I find great peace for slowing down and letting the Man take my hand and help me outta the car. (dedicated to Bob Goode, one of the most gentlemanly men I have ever known)

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4 Thoughts to “Big Deep Breaths”

  1. Shirley Goode

    Aww. This is so precious. Yes, you’re right. He is a gentleman, a sweet, funny, quirky, lovable gentleman. Thank you for this affirmation. He will be reading this in just a second, and I know he will need a Kleenex because he is also tender-hearted. Also, I needed one, too. Love you so much.

  2. Sharon

    This is truly a blessing to me Tammy. We are a lot alike. I am always “out there” and sometimes come off as crass. I am struggling with that a little with hubs. I don’t mean to but I’m impatient. And you are so right. Bob is one of the most gentlemanly man I’ve ever met. ❤️ Love you infinity

  3. Bessie Graham

    Keep breathing my sweet, remarkable woman. Beautifully written as always. Such a sweet dedication to Bob. Love you!

  4. Bobbi

    I have enjoyed reading all of your posts, but this one really struck home with me, since I too am very impatient and often forget to allow Bob to open the door for me. But after reading this I will remember it and be so thankful for the opportunity to be around a true gentleman and definitely wait for Bob to open my door. I feel so blessed to have him and Shirley in my life. You are truly a very talented and wonderful person.

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